My First Outing

It was back on July 5th that I was somewhat forced into my first outing with both kids .... by myself. Eli had his 2 wk. check up and circumcision, Mark was working, and it was my job to get both kids ready, myself ready, and to be at the doctor's office on time. Mark would meet me there. His appointment was at 1:30 that afternoon. I began getting everyone ready at 10:30 and it took me every single minute up until 1:15 to get everything taken care of. I'd feed one, then the other would wake up. Change one, then give one a bath. Then it'd be time to feed Eli again. It was never ending. Amidst all of this, Anna's morning nap got skipped and she's notorious for deliriously laughing when she gets really tired - of which she began and continued doing throughout the day. I seriously thought we would never make it on time. But we did - with all of 2 minutes to spare.

Needless to say, After Eli's appointment, he wasn't in the best of spirits. He was upset, crying, and understandably in pain. How unfortunate for him that we were out of milk and his sister is a milk hog. How unfortunate for me that I had to attempt Walmart with a 16 month old and 2 wk. old. Luckily by the time I got him back in the van, he was out like a light and stayed that way for several hours. So on to Walmart we went.

I drove around, giving up prime parking spaces, hunting down a space near a cart corale. I eventually found one, got parked, and sat there deciphering just how I wanted to attempt this. "Anna up front, Eli in the back?? No, no, vice versa would be best. No, then she'd.... forget it. Just get out and try something." Of which I did. My first attempt was Anna up front, Eli in the back. I quickly realized this wasn't going to work. The car seat took up the entire back of the buggy. So, in the hot July heat, I stood there sweating in the busy Walmart parking lot, switching kids back and forth, all the while with bystanders watching. How encouraging... I also discovered that for some odd reason, Eli's car seat wouldn't sit up like a normal one. He either had to sit so straight up his head fell on his chest or lean so far back it looked like he was standing on his head ..... I could only hope he wouldn't get a head rush.

As we finally headed inside, Anna wanted to test my patience. She kept standing up in the back of the buggy, bouncing up and down, and all I could foresee was her falling out. "Anna, sit down!" became the phrase of the day. Normally I would've spanked her, but for some reason, I tend to stray away from spanking her in public since there's a ton of individuals out there who think disciplining your child is their business. So, I stuck to telling her to sit down a thousand times and physically making her sit down.

She then began playing one of her favorite games - a game I detest. All parents know this game, and if they're honest, will also admit to hating this game. It's the pick-up game. Also known as the "I throw something down, you pick it up" game. She followed this by her new found phrase "Uh oh".

I was in the neosporin aisle, looking for which kind would be best, what's the best deal, etc. I had found one, put it in the cart, and continued looking to make sure that's the one I wanted, when I heard "Uh oh" and a thud. It was now on the floor. I put it back in there and told her "No!". Once again, "Uh oh". This continued on for several more instances of me telling her "It's not an uh oh when you throw it in the floor." After making my final decision on which one to get, I turned around and began to head to the food section when I noticed the sample lady starring at us with a smirk on her face. It was one of those times you wanted to yell "What are you looking at?" But no, I took her Abreva information, shoved it in my purse, and went on my merry way.

We hadn't even made it back to the milk section and Anna had a chunk of cardboard bitten out of the neosporin package. No wonder people were starring - I had a goat in the cart. While there, I decided to go ahead and get a few other items we needed - eggs, bread, grapes, bananas - all things I didn't want to put in the back of the cart with her but didn't have enough space to put up front around the car seat. Oh yes, she decided that chewing the neosporin package wasn't enough. She began chewing grapes, her favorite food, through the plastic bag. At this point, I didn't care. I just wanted to leave. If she enjoyed cardboard and plastic, so be it, they'd both pass through her system pretty easily.

While heading out of the fruits and vegetables section, we came across an old man who decided to jibber jabber with Anna when he suddenly noticed Eli. I knew what was coming and braced myself to graciously smile while gritting my teeth. Then it came "Oh, you have another one!??!". Seriously, have people never seen two kids close in age? It's not a novelty people!

So we finally found a checkout lane that wasn't a mile long, but still had a wait. Anna was beyond tired and began her deliriously obnoxious laughing spell, which any other time would be funny, but was now just embarrassing. She proceeded to hand the customers in front of us imaginary pieces of paper all the while laughing like a nut. They graciously played along.

We finally were out of there and got back home. I got both of them out of the van, back inside, and was all hot and sweaty. I lowered the garage, got a drink, put Anna down for a nap, and let Dexter out when I realized the groceries were still in the van....

Overall, I'd say it went pretty well.....